Skip to main content

Common misconceptions about introverts

Introvert pride

If popular opinion is any indication, the following labels are to be ascribed to introverts:

  • Lonely
  • Stuck-up
  • Selfish
  • Antisocial 
  • Withdrawn 
  • Isolated
  • People hater
Is this a fair, accurate representation of all introverts?

The answer should an emphatic no.

While some introverts may possess a couple of these characteristics, one cannot paint them with so broad a brush. 

It's like saying that all cheerleaders are airheads. Or that all sports guys are jocks.

These are pervasive stereotypes that need to be put to bed! 

Sure, introverts might turn down invitations from time to time. If we do make it to the party, you may see us leave early. And somewhere in between, we might excuse ourselves to get some fresh air, smoke a cigarette, or make a phone call.

We don't do it to be difficult, or because we're self-absorbed. It isn't that we loathe people. 

It's that our battery life is finite. 

Large crowds and endless chatter can leave us utterly drained. We're just not equipped to handle heavy social demands, unlike our more extroverted peers. 

Don't take our need for solitude personally. Rest assured that once our energy has been replenished, we'll be as good as new.  

But please do give us our space. If we're denied the opportunity to clear our minds and take a breather, we can become irritable and even less inclined to go out next time. 

People pin labels on introverts because it's the quickest, easiest thing to do in the absence of information.

They may not have the scoop on what introversion is all about, so they use first impressions to cast judgment. 

As the Transcendentalist, writer, poet, and philosopher Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862), who used solitude to form insights into the human condition, once said, "It's not what you look at that matters -- it's what you see." 

Something tells me Thoreau got plenty of flak for his introverted tendencies even back in his day. 

Unfortunately, elucidating the concept of introversion for these individuals doesn't always effect change. They may persist in calling you quiet, antisocial, or awkward because, well, it's easier than saying "introverted." 

Most people won't bother to do the research, and no amount of trying to spin introversion into a positive may alter their approach.

At least you will have done your part to communicate the ways in which introverts benefit the world. 

These are the characteristics we hope will someday (in an ideal world) be top of mind when people hear the word introvert:

  • Thoughtful
  • Intelligent
  • Perceptive
  • Creative
  • Profound
  • Hard-working
  • Respectful
  • Independent
  • Detail-oriented
I'll wrap up with a post by Susan Cain, author of Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking:

"Introverts think before they act, digest information thoroughly, stay on task longer, give up less easily, and work more accurately."

Yep, sounds to me like we're a special -- and underrated -- breed in a loud, fast-paced world. 

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Introverts, find your voice -- and let it be heard!

Introverts are, by their very nature, unassuming.  The last thing we want to do is draw attention to ourselves, whether it be promoting our accomplishments at work in hopes of landing a promotion, talking up our best traits on a blind date, or speaking up when on the receiving end of someone's unseemly behavior. But finding our inner voice is imperative. We must never let anyone -- and that includes ourselves -- silence it. It doesn't mean you have to turn surly, treating others like they're beneath you.  But you should never let yourself become anyone's doormat either. You're your own chief advocate. If you don't stand up for yourself, no one will.  Never feel too embarrassed or guilty to speak honestly and respectfully in support of your goals, values, and beliefs.  I'm not saying you need to become a masterful public speaker, or that you should pretend to be a Know-It-All.  Instead, what I'm saying is never to let anyone suppress your voice. You have ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Do introverts always want to be alone?

It's a common misconception that introverts want to be left alone all the time. Sure, we're not as prone as extroverts to becoming lonely and irritable in our own company, but that doesn't mean we avoid social interactions like the plague. We like to socialize, only in smaller doses than our more extroverted peers.  Here's how to keep us from exhausting our energy reserves: 1. Allow us small breaks to disconnect every now and then . Don't take offense to our wanting to go for a walk or take a nap. Perhaps we're drained after spending the day in drawn-out meetings.  2. A stampede of people? No, thanks.  Keep it to a small group of no more than 5 to 10 people, if possible. Introverts feel far more in their element when they can engage in one-on-one conversation. For us, more people usually translates to small talk on steroids. Needless to say, there aren't many things we loathe more than mindless chit-chat. 3. Don't block the exits. Heavy noise and commoti...
Post a Comment
Read more

My bumpy road to discovering I am an introvert

From an early age, I knew there was something about me -- my personality, my temperament -- that differentiated me from my peers. I just didn't know what it was. I sensed I was more retiring, less hungry for attention, and more at ease in solitude than most people.  Now that I'm an adult and comfortable in my introversion, I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm proud of my uniqueness, and every introvert on this page ought to be as well.  That isn't to say the road to self-awareness has been an easy one.  Whether at school or work, I've lost count of the number of people over the years who've either questioned or criticized my quiet, unassuming disposition.  In the workplace, supervisors and co-workers have pulled no punches with their biting sarcasm, saying things like "Hey, keep it down over here. You're too loud!" For whatever reason, it makes some folks uneasy when there's someone at work who keeps to themselves. They might suspect they...
Post a Comment
Read more